Friends, Friends, Friends....we will always be........

I asked a group of fourth and fifth grade students how they would describe a FRIEND!   The list of qualities they came up with was pretty impressive.  They thought a friend should be “thoughtful, considerate, trustworthy, honest, supportive, accepting, have similar interests, and of course someone fun to be around”.  They definitely encapsulated what being a friend is all about.  And no matter what your age, having friends is an important part of living a happy life.  Research shows that friendship is vital for well being, and can have a major impact on overall health.  The Mayo Clinic finds that friends can increase ones sense of belonging and purpose, boost happiness, reduce stress, improve self-worth, and help one cope better in bad times.  And when it comes to friends, there is no better place to develop true friendships than SUMMERCAMP!!!  Camp friends are friends for life.  Camp friends know us as we are, and accept us for who we   Being away from family, and surrounded by peers, gives campers a wonderful opportunity to develop deep and lasting friendships.  Camp friends see us through the day to day, encourage us to take on new challenges, make us feel a sense of belonging, help us through the tough times and most importantly make us laugh.

On December 8^th we will be celebrating our summer friendships at the Iroquois Springs Camp Reunion at New Roc City in New Rochelle.  We are so excited to see our summer family and watch friends get together, catch up, and reminisce about wonderful camp days.  Camp friends have been staying in touch through social networking and texting, but seeing one another in person and being able to talk face to face is priceless.   It’s the warmth of a hug hello, sitting side by side, sharing news and remembering the good times of summer. And after the reunion is over, campers bring home a piece of summer with their bunk pictures and a reunion video re-cap and DVD of the summer. 

We look forward to seeing the campers and staff that are able to attend and will certainly miss those that can’t make it.  But even if you can’t attend the reunion, the summer will be here before we know it and we will be with all our camp family once again.  See you all soon!

“Many people will walk in and out of your life; but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart”   Eleanor Roosevelt

Camp and Creativity

Creativity is the most unrestricted form of self-expression.  The ability to create something from personal feelings and experiences can reflect and nurture children’s emotional health.   Creative experiences can help children express and cope with their feelings.  Creativity also fosters growth by providing opportunities for trying new ideas, and new ways of thinking and problem solving. 

When we think of activities that encourage creativity, we often think of artistic endeavors.  While the arts and music are definite creative outlets, creativity is also found in science and play.  Creativity is about generating outcomes that are original and of value.  Creativity focuses on the process of forming original ideas through exploration and discovery.  According to Carolina A. Miranda of Parenting.com, “divergent thinking is an essential part of everyday life, whether it’s navigating office politics or devising a new social-media network”. 

Howard E. Gardner, professor of Cognition and Education at Harvard University considers creativity one of the five “minds” or ways of thinking – along with discipline, synthesis, respect, and ethics – that will be essential for young people to succeed in the future.  In today’s world, children are at a disadvantage when it comes to engaging in the creative process.   Games and activities that were once based on imaginative thinking now have step by step instructions on what the outcome should look like.  Take a box of Lego’s for example.  What was once a container of interlocking blocks to design whatever the imagination could dream up, now has clear cut instructions on how and what to build, taking away from the creative process.  Mark Runco, PhD, Director of the University of Georgia’s Torrence Center for Creativity and Talent Development believes we all have creative potential.  “Our job as parents and teachers is to help kids fulfill it”.  At Iroquois Springs we offer a variety of opportunities for children to develop their creative and critical thinking potential by providing a wide range of creative materials and experiences.

Camp exposes children to creative work by providing at atmosphere in which unique and creative work is valued.  U-Build-It is a great example of a program we offer that allows kids to be creative and use their imagination.  Campers use critical thinking when making Penny Boats out of tinfoil and discover just how many pennies they could load onto the boat while keeping it afloat.  Campers come up with creative solutions when participating in the Egg Drop, as they work together to figure out the best engineering to prevent the egg from cracking.  We take old computers, deconstruct them, and create Model Robots.  These activities, along with woodworking, wearable art, kitchen stadium, rock band, digital media, film, rocketry and performing arts all allow our campers to express their creative sides. 

Camp encourages kids to use creative thinking, and creative thinking skills are essential for success in learning and success in life. Developing the capacity to be creative can enrich lives and help children to contribute to a better society.

The Value of Inner Beauty

I read the following statistic in a Dove magazine advertisement, “6 in 10 girls stop doing what they love because of anxiety about their looks”.  How sad is that?  To think that girls give up the activities they enjoy, that have nothing to do with looks, because they are insecure about what they perceive as beautiful.   We can’t deny that it is a tough world out there when it comes to physical appearance.  The media focuses on having the ideal figure, the perfect hair, the whitest smile, and flawless skin. But in reality, the real beauty of a person goes far beyond just physical appearances.  Without inner beauty it doesn’t have much value.   Inner beauty is about traits that make you who you are…your personality and your character.   Inner beauty is about challenging yourself and doing what you love regardless of what you look like. 

We live in an image-focused society where children, especially girls, are aware of what is considered attractive as early as nursery school.  It is not uncommon to hear young girls to say that they like a certain teacher or celebrity because they are beautiful.  And insecurities about their own appearance begin just as early, with negative comments that they are too fat, or have bad hair, or too many freckles or just aren’t pretty enough.  Even if outward appearances are not focused on at home, young girls are not immune to the conversations and critiques that take place outside the home. 

So what can we do to build girl’s self-esteem and give them the confidence to do what they love and celebrate who they are?  The Dove “Girls Unstoppable” project is a great example of teaching self-esteem and celebrating real beauty.  But we too can do our part by stopping our own negative self-talk about our bodies and physical appearance.  Children listen to what we are saying, so we need to end the self-criticism and talk less about what we look like and more about our good qualities.  We need to speak about our accomplishments at work, the neighbor we helped out, the committee we offered our time to, as well as other people we value for the good they are doing.  Girls need to know they are valued for attributes beyond physical beauty.  Let your daughter know you admire her sense of adventure, her compassion, her intelligence, her sense of humor…. Inner qualities she can be proud of and qualities that will inspire her to challenge herself and put herself out there in the world. 

When I think of the women I admire the most, it has nothing to do with their physical appearance.  It has everything to do with their intelligence, humor, compassion, trustworthiness, and inner confidence that shines through.  I admire their abilities to work to their full potential, volunteer their time,  stand in the front row of a dance class regardless of their weight,  use their sense of humor, and to build people up when they are down.  I admire their character, their confidence, and their ability to see themselves for more than just what the mirror reflects back. 

It would be amazing if all young people faced each day feeling beautiful for the goals they have set, the challenges they take on, and the confidence they radiate when enjoying their life and all they have to offer from the inside.  I’d really like for that “6 in 10” statistics to change, and see more young women getting involved in the things that excite them and make them feel happy. 

“Beauty is how you feel inside, and it reflects in your eyes. It is not something physical”.  Sophia Loren.

Protecting our Children

I was watching my son’s baseball game this past weekend, and overheard the banter that was taking place in the dugout.  While most kids were talking about the game, or getting ready for their turn at bat, there was one boy who was teasing another saying how he wasn’t a good player in the field or at bat. The boy being teased did not defend himself, but instead became quiet and a bit withdrawn.  Not wanting this to escalate, and having very little tolerance for teasing or bullying, I made sure the coaches were aware of what was going on so that the teasing would stop and the boy being teased would be able to focus on playing the game.  I realize that adults cannot step in every time there is a situation of unkind behavior, but we can teach children to protect themselves from becoming victim to ongoing teasing and bullying.  Children that stand up for themselves and do not tolerate unkind behavior, also feel empowered to stand up for others. 

Bullying is certainly not a new dilemma in today’s society, but thankfully our awareness and understanding of the toll it takes on young people has grown tremendously.  A no-bullying tolerance in schools, camps, and all places youth are being served has become the norm.  There are numerous campaigns, like the Cartoon Networks “Stop Bullying, Speak Up” and the National Crime Prevention Associations McGruff the crime dog, who teaches kids to “Stop, Talk and Walk”.  The message is that kids need to stop listening to the bullies, use their voices to tell them to stop, and then walk away, all leading to greater self-respect.  McGruff also advocates being a friend to the person being bullied so they are not alone.

Here are some other helpful tools to empower kids and end bullying behaviors:

Teach children to be assertive.  Kids who seem insecure and lack confidence are often the target of bullying.  Teach children to stand up for themselves verbally, not violently.  Teach children to use a strong voice and tell the aggressor to stop.

Ask for help if needed.  Kids need to be reassured that it is okay to seek help from an adult if they feel frightened of the situation.  It’s okay to take action in a safe way.

Build empathy in your kids.  Teach them to relate to others and raise awareness of being in others people’s shoes.

Help them develop social skills.  Kids who don’t have friends or who always seem to be alone are usually the ones being picked on.  Help them to develop a strong circle of friends they can depend on. 

Be a good example.  Model respectful relationships and treat others fairly.  If you witness someone being bullied or hurt, help out. 

Remain calm.  Though it may be difficult to remain unemotional when insults come our way, teach children to assert themselves as calmly as possible.  Bullies are usually looking to upset their victims, and may stop if they are not getting a reaction. 

If during the next baseball game, the bully in the dugout continues to insult his teammate, I hope the boy being teased can look the bully in the eye, tell him to stop talking to him like that, and go sit with some other teammates.